One-armed Freddy's internet website

Full of magic, fun and swearing


I have started a new website, and I feel that you deserve an explanation.

The Internet is big and it has lots of things on it. And, despite earlier reports to the contrary, it’ll keep getting bigger and bigger. Which means more and more things you have to sign up to and find friends on. And now we’ve reached Web2.0 (does anyone actually use that phrase any more? Surely it must be at least Web2.2 by now?), there’s too bloody much of it! There’s the Facebook, the Twitter, the Youtube, the Flickr… loads of it. AND IT’S A BIG, DISORGANISED, AWFUL, STUPID, BASTARD MESS! AAAAAAAARRRRRGH!

I can’t keep track of it all. Yes, you can link things to your Facebook or your Twitter, but there’s no central hub that links to every service you use. Why the effity-uck not? Surely there should be an which is just a nice list of all your profiles and maybe a photograph of you full of beer. But no, the Internet dev team are too busy watching bukkake films and ordering Thai brides to sort it out. Twats.

So I took things into my own hands and created this website. As I sign up to more online services I’ll link to them from here. So if you want to look at pictures I’ve taken, read my thoughts on current affairs or call me a cockmuncher, you can do it all from right here.

The second reason for this website’s existence is that I used to have one and I liked it. I filled it full of bobbins and swears and it gave me a happy glow. By happen-stance I came across the website of a man called Cullen that I used to call a twat via the Interwebs (back when it was only version 1.3). He asked if I was doing any “online fuckery” (his words) and I responded in the negative. But then I thought, “why not? I SHOULD!”

So I’ll use the blog functionality of the WordPress to type things I think and do. You can read it if you like. Or you can not. Makes no odds to me.

Either way, this site exists and there’s nothing you can do. Except hack it. Please don’t hack it.

Much love,